Words of the Wise

It’s funny how you never truly appreciate “words of wisdom” until you are actually able to apply them. Then it’s like, all of a sudden, you realize why those words have been spoken.

One saying that I used to mull over in my head is “Nobody knows what’s in the soup but the spoon that stirs it.” I never understood it. But I had to admit that it made me curious.

And even after I acquired a general understanding, it didn’t mean much until I was able to apply it to my own life. Then it seemed to take on a whole new meaning. Different aspects of the saying seemed to evolve, and now it is definitely one of my favorite quotes… especially these days.

My very wise aunt introduced me to that quote, as well as to another one that is not so sophisticated, but it says a lot all on its own. If and when someone is upset, whether it’s at you or not, my aunt says, “Well, they have two jobs: to get mad, and to get glad!” That always sounded so silly to me. I always wondered How can someone just get glad after being mad? That makes no sense.

I know I haven’t blogged much since last year. But it really hasn’t been because I haven’t had much to say. It’s because I have internalized a lot. I let certain circumstances rule my judgments and my decisions. I let certain people bring me down. I have let their judgments and their perceptions inhibit my actions. And in doing so, I have denied myself happiness.
Now, more recently, I have pieced together several observations. All of a sudden, these pieces of an enormous puzzle have come together, and a sense of relief has developed. Those quotes, the ones my aunt has always told me, the ones I never understood, now make a whole LOT of sense.

One element that I think she was trying to teach me was resilience. We have to be resilient, especially when others attack us with words, with their judgments, with their self-righteous accusations… we have to be resilient. Not because strength is admirable. Not because it’s the mature thing to do. But because those attacks are not about us. Those attacks are about THEM. They have no idea what is going on in your life or your situation (the soup). Only you (the spoon) knows. Thus, they have no right to judge, and their words really do not matter. (Plus, the last time I checked only God has the right to judge, and as far as I’m concerned there is only ONE God.)

So, in saying “they have two jobs: to get mad and to get glad,” it is not to imply that changing moods is so easy. The true meaning is that you really should not take time to be bothered with whether other people are mad or glad. What they think and feel is what THEY think and feel. That is beyond your control, and you should not let it affect you. Let them get mad… and let them get glad… (and my little addition: Let them get over it. ;-)

Life goes on, and it’s time to be happy.