"Who ees?"

Every morning I make great efforts to make myself look presentable… from using the right type of shampoo and conditioner, to choosing the right hair styling products, to using the best straightening iron I could find—a Chi. I spend a significant amount of time checking to make sure that I straighten every strand of hair, making sure none is out of place… applying hairspray… adding finishing touches with a curling iron, then again with a straightening iron…
I, then, rush off to work… where I apply my make-up… because, truth be told, I am always running too late to apply it at home. So, I have to finish making myself look presentable at work. And, quite honestly, when I am finished, I do look okay… like I groomed myself… like I should have…
But, then something happens… I’m not sure what, but sometimes it’s gradual… sometimes it’s sudden. Either way, it is something really horrible.

Between the hours of 7 a.m. and 7 p.m., an invisible force creeps up on me, and sabotages all of my hard work. I don’t know why; I don’t know how. But the realization comes when I make a trip to the ladies’ room, and I look in the mirror, and the person that I saw at 7 a.m. is no longer there. Instead, there is someone who looks like “homeless girl gone wild,” and she is beyond help. She does not have the carefully straightened ‘do that I worked on. She wears a frazzled, frizzy mess of a mane, and apparently, her skin has an unquenchable thirst that can only be sated by drinking up all of the make-up I applied in the morning.

Whereas, the girl in the morning could benefit from make-up and hair care products, the one in the late afternoon is utterly and completely hopeless. No amount of make-up or hairspray can help her now. She must be cut off from society. I feel sorry for her. She must return home in shame. It is truly a tragedy.

Those of you who have seen her know what I’m talking about. I just wonder whether I should thank you for not criticizing, or be upset that you didn’t bother to tell me that this transformation is taking place.

The thing I can’t help but wonder is this: If that’s what I look like at the end of the day when I DO make efforts to groom myself, can you imagine what I’d look like if I made NO effort at all? It’s a scary thought, people.

But I can’t help but think that I would look better if I just rolled out of bed and went to work as is. I am so tempted to experiment… because if I could knock out all that time I spend getting ready, then that means I would be able to sleep longer…

I think it might be worth trying…